Thursday, April 12, 2012

Penny, You're Such A Dork, (Hear Ye, Hear Ye)


If someone were holding a gallon-sized ziplock bag jumbled full of these things, wouldn't you think they were taffies?  Would you still think that if the person holding a bag of these "softies" were a flight attendant offering them to passengers as they boarded the plane?  I did.  It was as I climbed aboard the PenAir turbo-prop which always seem kind of small and budget to me.  And handing out mini-sized taffies just confirms how cheap the airlines are getting these days.  I mean, even for a turbo-prop ride with only one flight attendant dressed in work pants, that is really budget!

Those planes are noisy, too.  Boy.  My whole body buzzed and rattled all the way til we landed again.  I glanced across the aisle and noticed that a passenger had ear plugs in his ears.  Hmmm.  Next time I'll try to remember to bring some ear plugs.  I could probably pick up a pair at Walgreens or somewhere like that.  

I mentioned to someone later, on the ground, that I wish I had known ahead of time to get ear plugs and she said, "They usually hand those out as you get on the plane. I'm surprised they didn't do that on your flight." 

Oh, those weren't cheap Hallowe'en candies, after all.  They were ear plugs!   I drew in a breath to exclaim I thought they were taffies and then caught myself.  If I had continued to admit to this new aquaintance that I had made that mistake not only once, but twice, I would have advanced from dork to nimrod. 

Now, let me tell you something pretty cool and interesting that you might like to try yourself.  If you drink a coke that makes you burp while you're on one of those excruciatingly buzzy flights that rattle your little melon, and you are using ear plugs, it makes a sound like a didjeridoo right between your ears.  Delightful! 

Yawning makes a funny sort of "wave organ" drone, too, but don't do a lot of facial contortions just to hear concrete acoustics in your head, especially if you're in the front row where the flight attendant can see you and pity you and pretend she didn't catch you pinching your nose and rubber-jawing.  That could be a little embarrassing.

1 comment:

DeEtta said...

This made me smile because I would have thought the package was candy too. I love reading about all your experiences, you have a way with words that bring them to life.